Written by David
Apr 9, 2012
First Date Disaster
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I met her at casual nice local pub for a light meal and about 90 minutes of conversation. It was a cold winter evening and the freezing rain was falling.
I was driving my 2 seater sports car and she had taken the subway to meet me but obviously felt comfortable enough to ask me to drop her at her home after dinner. I was expecting a relatively short date as it was early in the week and we had just met for the first time as a result of our online ads. I was not expecting anything from her other than perhaps another date. We had both enjoyed a good time and I found her sweet, attractive and personable.
Shortly after pulling up to the curb in front of her house I leaned over to kiss her goodbye on the cheek and thank her for meeting me. To my complete surprise my innocent peck turned into a major high school-like make-out session.
As a widower, I was new to the dating scene and was totally at a loss on how to handle this situation...but I pressed on.
Whilst making-out, I felt her hand unbuttoning my heavy winter coat and continue to travel beneath under my sports jacket to the area just below my belt. She squeezed, started to moan slightly, continued to squeeze and eventually rub me back and forth.I attempted to manipulate her groping and to recipricate but because of the tiny car interior, the hand brake and map compartment between us, the multipule layers of my clothes and my size, I was virtually trapped, unable to move.
After what seemed to be a very long long time she finally withdrew her tongue from my mouth, backed away slightly from my face and looked at me with absolute fire and passion in her eyes and whispered, "Oh my God, your penis is enormous"!!!
It was at this very moment that I realized that she had mistakenly been squeezing and petting the roll of belly fat below my waist thinking all the while that it was "an enormous penis"!!!
Her eyes told me she wanted more...much more... the real deal.... All I wanted to do was flee. I was literally speechless and dying of embarassment.
I managed to collect myself and made a joke about it being a school night and having an early 7 am business meeting.
Regrettably perhaps, (and coward that I am), I never spoke or saw her again.